1. "I'm coming". We do not just want to hear it, we want to be sure that neighbors also hear it, so they scream. Every man wants to know that he's making you reach orgasm, and what better way to tell him than if you do not explicitly state that you're doing it?

2. "You are so good at oral sex". We know how controversial it is for many men, so it's nice to know we do not have to worry. The males want to feel reassured about anything they do, even for trivial things like taking out the trash. When it comes to something that openly questions their masculinity, this desire increases tenfold.

3. "You are so much stuff". This is a direct reference to the penis, not to our weight in general or to the waistline. Nobody wants to be told: "You are so wide that I can not logically carry on this primary human interaction, for which our bodies are conceived."

4. "Wow, this is the best sex I've ever done". You have to say it sincerely, though. We realize if you say it like when you make compliments for the meatloaf to your friend Teresa, despite disgusting. Because bad sex is like meatloaf: it's both damn horrible things that happen to good people.

5. "I had never come like this before." The Guinness Book of Records was born when men understood that establishing records teases the basic parts of our brains. Knowing that we are the personal champion of orgasm of your vagina warms our heart.

6. "Come on, you just won the lottery". Literally. We would like to hear it at any time of the day. In some ways, it would be even better if we find out that we have won millions of euros while our penis is inside a vagina.

7. "Give me everything you want". And we immediately put you in the position of the doggy style.

8. "You look really sexy like that". Wow, what? We men do not think we can look sexy, because we are men. Unless we are in the shortlist of People's Man of the Year candidates, this compliment is pleasantly unexpected.

9. "Have you heard that we have finally conquered peace in the world?". It would be really great to find out that human suffering has been eliminated while we are still alive.

10. "I can not take it anymore, let's have anal sex". It is equivalent to the discovery of peace in the world, but as regards the backside.

11. "Hey, my best friend is out here, can you join us?" Yes. Invite all your friends. But will not there be something under it?

12. "All my body trembles". It's tangible proof that we've been good and we know you have not just pretended.

13. "Can I practice fellatio?". You just asked if you can do all the work you while I'm lying here? Yup!

14. "It was so fantastic that I do not even take it if you go to the bar and watch the game with your friends, even if I'm free". We did it, we made the perfect orgasm.